Why Montessori Educators Avoid Saying “Good Job” – And What to Say Instead

If you’re new to Montessori education, you may have noticed that teachers rarely say, “Good job!” or use other forms of non-specific praise. This approach might seem surprising at first, especially if you’re used to hearing or giving such compliments to encourage children. However, there’s a well-thought-out reason behind it. Montessori philosophy emphasizes fostering intrinsic motivation, independence, and self-confidence in children. And using specific praise is a wonderful way to achieve these goals.

A child and mother exchanging a high five- examples of Montessori alternatives to 'good job'

The Problem with Non-Specific Praise

Non-specific praise, such as “Good job!” or “You’re so smart,” often focuses on the outcome rather than the effort or process. While these comments are well-meaning, they can have unintended consequences:

  1. Encouraging Dependence on External Validation: When children hear “Good job!” frequently, they may begin to rely on external approval to gauge their success instead of developing an internal sense of accomplishment.
  2. Overlooking the Process: Non-specific praise focuses on the result, which can discourage children from taking risks or enjoying the learning journey. They may become more concerned about getting things “right” than experimenting and growing.
  3. Losing Meaning Over Time: Repeatedly saying “Good job” can dilute its impact. Children might stop paying attention to the words altogether because they hear them so often.

The Montessori Approach to Encouragement

In Montessori education, the focus is on fostering intrinsic motivation—a child’s natural drive to learn and achieve for their own satisfaction. Instead of offering generic praise, Montessori educators provide specific, meaningful feedback that helps children reflect on their actions and efforts. This focus on using specific praise builds self-confidence, independence, and a genuine love of learning.

What to Say Instead of “Good Job”

Here are some Montessori-inspired suggestions for using specific praise with your child:

  1. Acknowledge Effort: Highlight the work the child put into the task.
    • Example: “You worked really hard on that puzzle, and you didn’t give up when it got tricky.”
  2. Describe What You See: Provide neutral observations about their actions.
    • Example: “I see that you used all the blocks to build a tall tower.”
  3. Ask Questions: Encourage the child to reflect on their work.
    • Example: “How did you decide to use those colors for your drawing?”
  4. Focus on Specifics: Point out details in their work or behavior.
    • Example: “You matched all the pairs of socks! They’re all together now.”
  5. Express Gratitude: Show appreciation for helpfulness or kindness.
    • Example: “Thank you for helping clean up. That made it easier for everyone to find what they need.”

The Long-Term Benefits

By shifting from using specific praise, parents and educators can help children:

  • Develop a stronger sense of self-esteem rooted in their own efforts and achievements.
  • Build resilience and a willingness to tackle challenges.
  • Learn to value the process of learning as much as the result.

This approach aligns with the Montessori philosophy of respecting each child’s individuality and nurturing their inner drive to learn and grow.

Key Takeaway

Replacing “Good job” with thoughtful, specific feedback is a simple yet powerful way to support your child’s development. By focusing on effort, process, and reflection, you’re fostering a lifelong love of learning and helping your child build the confidence to achieve their goals independently.